i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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