i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
