I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
