Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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