im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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