You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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