i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
