I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
