is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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