Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Randomize
