I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize