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• (561): View more from Florida

  he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  you for real need to get over him dude

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.

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• (716): View more from New York

  crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.

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• (972): View more from Texas

  Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (478): View more from Georgia

  So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home

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• (424): View more from California

  at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.

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