smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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