I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Randomize
