She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize