ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
