You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Randomize
