2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
