Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
