My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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