i jhust puked up my retainher.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
