Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
