My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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