I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
