I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
