that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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