i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
