Grow some girl-balls and come out already
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
