i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
he laminated a picture of his dick.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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