I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Buhtt sex?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
