he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
