Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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