I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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