sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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