This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
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