Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
