she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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