we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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