I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
