You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
