Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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