we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
