When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
So many bounce houses so little time
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
