Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
