It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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