More tranny stories later!
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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