I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
