You made me cry and you don't even care
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize