It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
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