she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
